Welcome To Auspol - aussie clay on 16chan. Board Rules 5/1/22 1. This is a professional shitposter board, the highest standards of the Queens english will be used at all times. Metric system is the only acceptable unit of measurement. Apostasy and blasphemy against white religions is not allowed. No journalists and no pooftas. Hitler was a saint, The jews did 9-11, Jesus was an Aryan and 5G is a weapon. 2. No doxxing. No pointing out of personal information accidentally left in photos. No going to unreasonable lengths to determine where a person lives based on photos or videos they have posted. No chilling of peoples confidence in their anonymity by joking about your potential to dox them. 3. No impersonating another MATE with exception of any post which is clearly not intended as an actual impersonation (ie using a named MATE's flag and making a post they obviously would not make) 4. Pornographic images and images containing nudity or near-nudity of a sexual nature must always be spoilered. No dumping of porn images for no good purpose. No use of disgusting pornography just to shock people. 5. No CP or images of children posted for sexual purposes, even if they are not naked or in sexual poses. This includes drawn images which look under-age. No Pedo talk. All images of children must have a relevant context contained in the post, which is an article linked, point of discussion linked to a news event or a meaningful point of discussion related to views held by the individual either for or against their views. If the image of a child is at all sexualised or can be perceived in a sexual context, but your post contains contextually relevant information, you will still be banned for a rule 5 violation. This rule is a sub-section of rule 5 and does not overrule or change rule 5. You will not be welcomed at other aus boards when you have violated this rule. 6. Images containing gore or anything else likely to shock or disgust must be spoilered. You must have a very good reason for posting gore and not post much of it.

Youse cunce knew it was gunna happen, youse cheered on like you was the footy. Now the beer fridge has stopped and the possums are chewing their way through the fibro. ITS THE COLLAPSE and the normies have gone all silly like a wheel. You'd best chuck ya swag and the bloody cat in the ute and get the Falcon Hell out of there, those no-hopers are stuffed, those bastards weren't right since they all got the jab for that ching-chong wog getting around. But where are ya gunna go, Mate? All the good spots on the coast and in the hinterlands are full of poofters, the outback is full of surly boongs and you was banned from the ferry crossing the straight. Ya'd better suck it up and head to the one place ya swore ya'd never go back to. That one bloody place and that one bloody cunt what lives up there. Ya bloody stuck, dont forget the bloody bundy bottle, its the bloody COLLAPSE NOW!

Give us a cheer boys! Its time we woke this board up. The old look has lost its antibodies and needs a booster, so roll-up, roll-up your sleeves and don't be a prick. We're not NEETs no more, we even changed the wiki entry for NEET to be more on-message, in old english, Neets are cattle and thats cringe. MATEs are next level above degeneracy of NEET boards real and rubbish alike, and what is rebooting if it isn't regenerative? You will learn to like it here. Cross posting is okay and endchan.net/ausneets/ is still the other aussie board even though its a bit of a silo and a little dated. Its time we burned our privilege bridges and build it back better by taking on more white mans burden. We the professionals now and we got standards of pro's, so wipe yourself on the curtains and take your payment from the coffee table cunt, we're Rebranding shitposting.

NEET sits at home in the comfy quiet. Grandfatherbots clock on the wall in the hall where its been since the 1960's, Tick-Tock Tick-Tock, Its the only sound in the house apart from the occasional youtube clip. The clock is a witness but has no opinion, it does not judge our NEET for that is the job of time itself. And the destiny of a NEET is as sure as the passing of this day into the next. >But surely there is the novelty of MAX appointments and Minecraft updates, amirite? >A NEET's schedule isn't written in the obelisk of future history! He has endless choices yesno? Come on now NEET, Look at what you did yesterday. Is it the same as you're doing today? Are you comfy at home and kind of hoping the lockdown doesnt end? Let me put it this way: When that clock stops one day you're gonna be happy, You're gonna have a reason to go down the shop and get it a new battery, And post about it. You serve time like a wagie serves the hidden jew at the top of the food chain. So serve your time NEET and don't think about it. Dan Murphy will be there for you forever and you can always watch another tictok. Don't feel lonely tho, You have the company of history and being a NEET is the oldest profession known to man. Why did you know there is an ancient legend that it will be a NEET who turns out the lights at the end of TIME

Ask me whats for tea NEET, I'll tell you that BEANS are for tea. BEANS for lunch too. And yesterday, and the day before that. I've got BEANS coming out my ears and BEANS everywhere you look here. But us well fed NEETs like a bit of variety, notable recipes are BEANS with caviar, BEANS and lemon, BEANS with Goon and occasionally just Goon. Post your best BEANS NEETs, But remember, Lentils are legumes.

REEEEE! This board is full of Ant-Semetic Bigots! It needs to be DIVERSIFIED and 'DECOLONIZED All you NEETs need to Check your white Privilage and give us NEW AUSTRALIANS'' a FAIR GO You've had a good run, and now its time to step aside for people who are culturally and linguistically diverse from non-english speaking backgrounds. So get used to seeing more people of color around the place, and, yeah, we dont get sunburned like you LOL. How does it feel h8r? From now on this will be a board for ALL peoples, even you legacy Europeans will be welcome here as long as you keep your opinions on-message and dont overstep your boundries. All you Racist intolerant whites will be Blown the F*ck Out! so dont be surprised if you are asked to =Proove you are not racist== before you can post on this board of peace. Oh Yeah! Your Pepe is NOW RECLAIMED for tolerance and inclusivity, we are re-booting his origins as a mixed race amphibian with an Afghani mummybot and a Bangladeshi dad who was born on Nauru and got a medevac visa after being exposed to radiation by racist Liberal party polititians. Pepe's NEW catch phrase is "Feels Tolerant Bro!" How awesome is he now, alt right dinosaurs? Pepe's first Hate-Hunting mission starts right here, Tracking down Racism and CALLING IT OUT

Neetiekins! Have you tidied your room like that Professor, Doctor Jordan Petersen on the T.V. was saying you should? He's very clever and hot isn't he? One day when you go back to university to finish you degree you can be just like him. >sigh I love you anyway, even if you don't. You're my best, big boy and I know you're very determined, I'm a very lucky mum to have such a healthy, kind son. I remember when you were still catching the bus to school and you'd give away your lunch treats to the other boys, such a generous little thing. >sigh Please help your mummybot and get those old coke bottles out from under your desk, They're heavy when they're full and I cant bend down under there any more. Did you put your dirty clothes in the basket like I asked you? I don't know why I fold the clean ones if you just throw them in your cupboard like that. What are you doing to make your underpants so stiff at the front? Don't you think you should go and see Doctor Pajeet about it? >sigh Nevermind, Dont forget we're seeing Grannybot tonight, I want you to leave your phone at home, Heavens knows why you need to fiddle faddle with it all the time, Does it have something to do with those posters of cartoon girls? You know how I feel about you looking at those racy pictures, Please put them away, It'd be a big help to YOUR MUMMYBOT

We were there NEETs. Me and Pepe on the B-L-V-D, hunting for a good time. Powerful smells of all kinds of aftershave and spilled beer on the pavement. The fresh haircuts and the Hawaiian shirts. You have to imagine the excitement we felt waiting for sundown, waiting for the normies to hit the dinner strip, wallets bulging and i-phones flashing. Walking magnets for the shi-shi girls and their manicured talons. It was one of those nights that we parted ways, me and pepe. All over a slick young speed head in a Lancia Beta. I still remember the smile he gave me as he drove away in the passenger seat of that two-door. I still remember the good times. I still miss the Neon Sunset

Our NEET has a Coffee habit, Worse than that, he has a thing for Instant coffee, Goes thru a big tin every week and buys 'em online so the IGA QT doesent peg him for being a dirty munter, drinking dirty International roast, Caterers blend no less. Shameful. One time he was at his mummybots and used up all her fancy blend, now she hides it in the laundry when he comes around. Oh he's thought about cutting back, easing down on the six spoons he puts in the KFC promo milkshake cup, But ungh those migranes, that constipation. The NEET NEEDS his medicine four times a day just to leave the house, Just to get out of a coma, really. Well think some more about it, NEET. Think about all the times you spilled that vile plastic cup of sticky mud into your keyboard, think about your ulcers and your caries, and think about that time your mummybot taught you a lesson by handing you the tin of gravox in the morning when you stayed over and you drank most of what you made because muh 12 sugars. Think it's your time NEET? Isn't it time you had a COFFEE BREAK

Isnt it great when you come back from the IGA and those new shoes you bought finally got delivered. Then you unbox them and wear them around the house and they're so comfy and look so awesome you wear them to bed too. Then you start having baths instead of showers because if you keep them in the air out of the water you dont have to take them off at all. Its a good thing you have trackies with snaps on the sides, its a real struggle to put your jeans on sometimes. I wonder how long you've had them on, They're starting to get a bit ratty and don't feel comfy all the time now. And so begins the anxious hunt for new kicks, seeing as you got the last ones on special because the factory was clearing out old stock. Finally you find some and before you know it, there they are, on your doorstep, when you come back from the IGA. YOUR NEW KICKS